Simple sports questions stump even the latest technology - New York Post

Gee, after that World Series, it was sure nice that Thursday’s Bills-Jets ended at such a civil, all-in time, 11:45 p.m.

Anyway, at first, Alexa and I got along great: “Alexa, turn on my light,” “Alexa, turn off my light.”

Now? She claims to have no idea what I’m talking about. I even have to reach over to turn out the light, myself. Was it something I said?

Thus, as lingering questions remain unanswered, Alexa will be no help.

For example, we’ve completed a second consecutive season during which Gary Sanchez, who needs a Spanish-to-English interpreter to conduct interviews, stood on the mound speaking with Masahiro Tanaka, who needs a Japanese-to-English interpreter, while both held their gloves over their faces.

Does this prevent lip-reading opponents — every team now has at least one — from decoding and relaying the contents of their conversation to the batter before the next pitch?

Does Tanaka speak Spanish or does Sanchez speak Japanese? Or does each think the other has bad breath?

Then there’s Seattle receiver Doug Baldwin. Oct, 22 against the Giants he caught a touchdown pass then genuflected in the end zone in what appeared to be solemn spiritual reflection. In the 2015 Super Bowl he caught a TD pass then mimed defecating the ball.

What gives? Does the NFL allow six-point conversions?

Next, we have those who have watched Notre Dame football this season under the TV-delivered impression that ND’s turnaround is in large part due to its vast improvement in the Red Zone.

But with 40 seconds left in a 35-14 win Oct 28, ND from the N.C. State four, let the clock expire. And as former ABC stats man Ed Joyce notes, this was immediately registered as a complete Red Zone failure to be calculated and included in future TV show-and-tells as insight.

Years after Red Zone stats debuted, we still don’t know if fourth-and-6 from the 19 holds the same statistical weight as first-and-goal from the 1. That’s the first question I asked Alexa — she answered something about the Cold War — but I fully suspect it does.

Thus, what’s regularly presented to us as revealing is less than worthless — the NFL’s three most successful Red Zone teams last season went 18-30 — but, still, so what?

The best I can do is to stop capitalizing Red Zone. From now on, it’s red zone.

Then there’s the painful extraction of clear, applicable talk, replaced with even more painful vacant blandishments. Joe Tessitore, on ESPN’s Oklahoma State-West Virginia, said both starting quarterbacks “have unique skill sets.” How many skills can a QB have that each has at least one that’s unique?

Next, there’s suspended Giants cornerback Janoris Jenkins, who was jettisoned from the University of Florida team in 2011 following two assault arrests, two drug busts. And though the annual criminality of Florida’s recruited student-athletes has become a given, Jenkins violated UF’s strict code of conduct: four arrests and you’re out.

Still, the Giants signed him to a five-year $62.5 million deal. Why, Alexa, why?

On Sept. 23, A’s catcher Bruce Maxwell became the first and only MLB player to take a knee during the national anthem. That made a ton of news and noise.

Last week Maxwell was arrested, charged with aggravated assault with a deadly weapon — a gun — held to the head of a woman delivering food to his home. Why didn’t that make as much news or noise?

Finally, why are Subway sandwiches piled high with meat … but only in TV ads?

Why? I don’t know. I’d ask Alexa but we’re no longer speaking.

Lots of news blowing around the FAN

Busy week, in and around WFAN.

For starters, Joesph Meli, accused confederate of Craig Carton in a ticket Ponzi scheme, Tuesday pleaded guilty to fraud. He’s facing 5-8 years in prison at a January sentencing. Monday, another defendant in the case, Steve Simmons, pleaded guilty to conspiracy.

Carton, still claiming total innocence, is scheduled for a Wednesday court hearing.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch, Gregg Giannotti seems to be a lock as Boomer Esiason’s new full-time partner.

Giannotti, 2006 Hofstra grad and former FAN intern, thus far has been heard as credible, clever and clean — criteria avoided by Carton in accordance with the how-to-succeed-in-radio manual. Residually, perhaps, Esiason is now more inclined toward good conversation, limiting his obligatory coarse tack-ons.

Giannotti also voices a superb Mike Francesa imitation. Ah, Francesa.

Last week he sounded fully prepared to disembark WFAN as Capt. Queeg, more delusional and megalomaniacal by the minute, worsening self-inflation until his head bursts.

Where once he deluded himself into thinking that his now past-tense friendship with Bill Parcells was preface to a top executive position with the Jets, perhaps GM, last week he seriously told a caller he would seriously consider an offer to manage the Yankees, provided — and he repeated this — “the money is right.”

Got that? His first managerial job will cost the Yankees plenty — though Francesa now can claim that the Yankees couldn’t afford him.

Mike FrancesaN.Y. Post: Charles Wenzelberg

Then he turned to what he’ll do post-WFAN, his previous “retirement” claim another dishonesty, and his heroic public offer to rescue the station after the sudden exit of Carton apparently rejected — or not even broached — by WFAN/CBS Radio.

Francesa spoke as if the world will know his decision has been reached by keeping a vigil for white smoke billowing from the Vatican’s chimney. Recalling his fabricated claim that The Pentagon had solicited his advice — lost tape — he dubiously claimed Twitter has recruited him, but he’s undecided.

He also said his current contract forbids him to say where he’ll next rule. First, he said he has to “go dark” until Jan. 1, then revised that to “90 days.”

Next, crushing news: “You’re going to have to suffice for a little while. You’re going to have to get along without me.”

But then good news, peons: Though comically infamous the past 25 years for making (then ignoring) colossally wrong picks, he said he’ll find a way to “release” — sell? — his NFL picks, because “they have value.”

Wherever he goes, including just going away, there will not be a mirror worthy of his reflection.

Reports raining supreme

Last Sunday’s East Coast heavy rainfall was a windfall for NFL sideline reporters.

On FOX’s Falcons-Jets, Kristina Pink three times reported what couldn’t be missed — it’s raining hard. The third time she held up a clear cup, two-thirds filled with rainwater, to prove it.

Next, FOX’s Erin Andrews, from Washington, reported this astonishing fact about the Dallas QB: “This is the first rainy game for Dak Prescott.” Yes, since childhood, he played all his football either indoors, or outdoors — unless it was raining.

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